Unmarked thoughts

“What is a poet? An unhappy man who hides deep anguish in his heart, but whose lips are so formed that when the sigh and cry pass through them, it sounds like lovely music.... And people flock around the poet and say: 'Sing again soon' - that is, 'May new sufferings torment your soul but your lips be fashioned as before, for the cry would only frighten us, but the music, that is blissful.” -Soren Kierkegaard
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Gary Provost

“This sentence has five words. Here are five more words. Five-word sentences are fine. But several together become monotonous. Listen to what is happening. The writing is getting boring. The sound of it drones. It’s like a stuck record. The ear demands some variety. Now listen. I vary the sentence length, and I create music. Music. The writing sings. It has a pleasant rhythm, a lilt, a harmony. I use short sentences. And I use sentences of medium length. And sometimes, when I am certain the reader is rested, I will engage him with a sentence of considerable length, a sentence that burns with energy and builds with all the impetus of a crescendo, the roll of the drums, the crash of the cymbals–sounds that say listen to this, it is important.”

(for later)

Tarot Deck

01 Fool "Mind your step"
02 Magician "Great minds think alike"
03 High Priestess "Trust your instincts"
04 Empress "Good things come to those who wait"
05 Emperor "Who's your daddy?"
06 Hierophant "It's right behind you"
07 Lovers "If it's easy, it's probably wrong"
08 Chariot "To the victor go the spoils"
*09 Strength "I ain't got time for this"
10 Hermit "Did anyone bring a light?"
11 Wheel of Fortune "I have a good feeling about this"
*12 Justice "The center does not move"
13 Hanged Man "Better get a second opinion"
14 Death "Nothing begins and nothing ends"
15 Temperance "Everything in moderation"
*16 Devil "Everyone has a price"
17 Tower "How fragile we are"
18 Star "Anything can happen"
19 Moon "Crazy is you amplified"
20 Sun "Everything is going to be alright"
21 Judgement "Time to change"
22 World "Are you ready?"


Name: Kremlin
Age: 29

Beau the Wizard had enslaved his goblin tribe and was using them as test subjects for his MAD experiments. Kremlin was "employed" as an assistant when it was discovered he had a talent for artificing and alchemy. In an attempt to free his clan, Kremlin intentionally created an alchemical disaster that exploded in a 20 mile radius, destroying the wizard's laboratory, the wizard... and all of his clan. He survived due to some ingenious quick thinking, which may have involved a bath tub.

He is now on the run from the wizard's multitude of apprentices who are out for vengeance.

He feels that the wizard picked on his tribe because they were poor and of no significance to anyone. He believes that if he were rich, then he would be of significance, and this would never happen again. Kremlin is on the hunt for wealth.


for brendan

D&D4e Character - Fortuna v2

Name: Fortuna
Age: Claims to be 33 (is likely older)

She says her name is Fortuna but it seems a little too convenient for a woman of her occupation. She is a seer, a self-claimed diviner of the Yet Unknown. Her official job, prior to this more heroic pursuit, was "herb witch", making a living in rural villages where a practised midwife and discreet abortionist was always in demand.

She loves going to new places, meeting new people... and then conning them blind. Afterwards there's a hasty departure, which usually results in going to new places. Fortuna's wants are few.

She seems to be allergic to the truth and will always lie when confronted, even when she doesn't have to.

Despite the compulsive lying, the possible kleptomania, and a loose interpretation of personal property law - Fortuna doesn't seem entirely free of morals. She'd never intentionally cause harm or steal from a child. For someone who claims to see through the veils of time, Fortuna lives very much in the now. She doesn't save money, doesn't hold grudges, doesn't seem to plan ahead. The wealth she earns today is given away tomorrow. This probably doesn't bode well for the future.

When asked directly about her motives, she says she made a deal with a devil. She says she traded her homely life for a deck of cards. Personally, Fortuna muses, she thinks she came out ahead.


Fortuna was raised by a herb witch in some rural farming village in Cormyr where she learnt her craft. On her days off she mucked about with the Third Eye, telling penny fortunes for the girls in the village.

One summer's day in the middle of the market square, she was struck with prophecy. Her body went as rigid as a rake and her eyes rolled up into the back of her head. There may even have been drooling.

In the waning reign of the Moon
Hand turns the wheel and grey mouse ascend
Shuttle and reed across the loom
All sleep shall flee til journey's end

Should the Bane of Blades live past wake
The grey mouse fall in that dawning year
Weave sundered by far kinder Fates
And man, his freedom to revere

But should the Dread Beast rise that eve
Dark unbinding heralds endless war
His blood the promised price receive
The grey mouse shall be mouse no more

It was just her luck that she blurted this out in a language that no one else understood. The villagers, alarmed and frightened, threw stones at her for being "creepy" and "probably demon possessed." The next day, she was unwelcome in town. A bad harvest later and Fortuna found herself homeless, fleeing a burning cottage with naught but the clothes on her back.

In the intervening years she has learnt that it is safer to be an idiot charlatan, than it is to be "probably demon possessed."

Whereas before her Third Eye hardly worked at all, now her visions came with alarming intensity whenever she so much as thought about it, and often with detrimental side effects. If she was lucky, it would be something minor like an embarrassing rash or a twitchy eyelid. If she wasn't (and Fortuna soon realised she normally wasn't), it could be something really bad, like her horse breaking a leg during an escape, or a shipwreck of the ship she was on. Thus it was doubly safer for her to be the idiot charlatan, than it was to be a true seer.

Sometimes the Misfortune lasts for years... Ever since her first Doozy, Fortuna was cursed to wander the land with itchy feet and insomnia. It made her snappy and short tempered /all the time/. She doesn't remember those years very well. She recalls she went places and then yelled at people.

Upon meeting this troupe a few years ago, her itching, her twitching, whatever strange grip this Misfortune had on her mind suddenly abated. For the first time in twenty years, she was able to sleep uninterrupted. Fortuna is certain that somehow this Party is related to her prophecy but she doesn't know how or why or what. She doesn't really care, however - after twenty years of searching, it is enough for her to know that she is finally where she is supposed to be.

Fortuna's real name is Iris, but only she would know that. It's also not really a big deal.


Those being fennel, acacia paste, penny royal, ground seeds of wild carrot, aloe mixed with beer, root of the birthwort, asarum, artemesia from Thay, celery seeds in high doses, seeds of the chaste tree, dittany, hair of love, a mix of wine and juniper or cyprus chips with mint, thyme, rosemary and hyssop, toxic rue in high doses, squirting cucumber from Chult, and the humble willow.


Whenever my mom says I'm not pretty at all, I just tell her "that's funny, people always tell me I look like you."

If growing up is realizing your parents are human, becoming an adult is realizing you don't need to take shit from them anymore. No one has the power to make you feel worthless, and no one has the right to demand respect from you.

If my brother is right in that I have a problem with authority figures, then I say damn right I do. I don't have a problem granting authority. I have problem giving it to people who demand it, but don't earn it.

Your parents are the first. It's like childhood is a restaurant and becoming an adult is like paying the bill. At the end there's a little section marked "tip" and you decide what your parents are worth. If they're worth your respect.

If my waiter gives me shitty service, spits in my food, comments about how ugly I look, or what a burden I was ever since I was born, then you can be sure that at the end of it, I'm going to write a big fat zero on his tip and walk away feeling pretty good with myself.

I don't feel like I should apologize for this.

My relationship with my mother is a lot more complicated in this regard - because I am well aware that she did sacrifice a lot for me. However I have this underlying knowledge that the woman I give my respect to now is not the same woman who worked for it. Some days I feel like an orphan, with only the memory of a mother in my head.

As for my father, I don't have the same experiences as my brothers, so when they try and /force/ me to respect him, I can only laugh. I don't try to make them see it from my point of view, but they should not attempt to convince me otherwise either.
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